Life

Last night my friend, Debbie Petras, shared a post about the Giving Thanks Challenge 2010 another friend is currently hosting.

I went over to her blog to get the details but, because I had been taking care of my Mom for several days, was too tired to write my introductory post before going to bed. I decided to sleep on it and write it first thing this morning.

For some reason I didn't sleep well. My mind was racing with thoughts of things that I need to accomplish before the end of the year. It's a fairly long list and I seem to be growing further behind with each passing day. My rest was fitful and disturbed and my head hurt.

This morning I woke up early with the same nasty migraine that I went to bed with. Usually migraine medications help when I take them. I didn't. Mostly because on Saturday I'd jumped out of bed to race over and feed my Mom's cat (who eats like a pig) and was hit by a wave of dizziness much like you'd experience while riding a merry-go-round. My blood pressure was low--again.

Nothing about my routine had changed aside from taking Imitrex before going to bed. The first pill had not worked and because it seemed a possible culprit I bypassed a second dose, despite the constant pounding sensation in my head throughout the entire day. Anything to avoid another drop in my vitals during the night.

This morning I woke up early and quietly moved out of bed with lightening speed, thinking I'd grab my netbook and post my intro before going next door. Unfortunately I couldn't take a step due to the spinning. Feeling for the edge of the bed, in our still dark room, I sat down quickly.

The longer I sat the louder the roaring noise in my ears got. I've stood by passing trains that were quieter. There wasn't any point in trying to fight it. My blood pressure was even lower than yesterday and my head felt like it might explode. I laid back down feeling discouraged.

When my husband began to stir I asked for a large glass of water. Despite the desire to retrace all of my steps in an effort to determine why this problem was surfacing again the headache wouldn't let me think. As soon as I was steady enough to stand I went next door to take care of the lifting and bending so my Mom's back can heal. She was worried I'd faint. She has cause to worry. I've done it dozens of times. Blacked my eyes. Bloodied my nose. But thankfully not today. Today my body gave warning signs. And kept breathing.

I quickly finished up my chores and, instead of staying to visit, returned to our side of the condo to get rid of the migraine. It's been a few hours and most of the pain is gone. My thinking is not clear but it's much better than earlier. While resting I thought about abandoning the challenge. Things are getting off to a rocky start. I also thought about all of the blessings that surround me. My life is full of them. Including having the luxury to rest.

Then I began to think back to a time, a few years ago, when my life nearly came to an end. My body crumbled to the floor without warning. Paramedics came to our home, tended to me in our kitchen floor, and told my husband that they were unable to find a pulse or blood pressure--or any signs of life. I wrote a short account of it recently here.

The longer I rested the more it dawned on me that, despite having frustrating blood pressure issues, I am thankful for LIFE. Without LIFE I would not be able to enjoy any of it's blessings. I thank God for giving me LIFE (see Psalm 139) and sustaining my LIFE in difficult times.

I. Am. Grateful.

"In his hand is the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind." Job 12:10